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  • Home
  • About Us
    • Meet Alexa
    • Meet Danielle
    • Meet Jordan
    • Meet Luisa
    • Meet Monique
    • Meet Padma
    • Updated COVID-19 Response for Therapy
    • Employment at Modern Change
  • Services
    • Adolescents and Teens
    • Brainspotting
      • What To Expect in a Brainspotting Therapy Session
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    • Individual Therapy
      • Counseling for Anxiety
      • Help for Friends & Family of Addicts
      • Trauma Therapy
      • Mindfulness-Based Therapy
      • Therapy for Depression
    • LGBT Affirming Therapy
    • Life Changes & Transitions
      • Counseling for New Mothers
    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
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      • PreMarital Counseling
    • Substance Use Help
    • Clinical Supervision
    • Teletherapy
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    • Modern Change Therapy FAQs
    • Practice Policies & Privacy Information
    • Rates and Insurance
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    • Physical Health Links
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919-576-0084

monique@modernchangenc.com

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What is flooding & what to do when you or your partner is flooded

November 10, 2019 by Monique Porter Leave a Comment

Certain emotions like anger, rage, fear, panic and hurt can cause us to become overwhelmed and act irrationally. Read more for tips on how to handle emotional flooding in your relationship.

Emotional flooding happens when our nervous system goes into overdrive. This can be a common experience when we have an argument with our partners. Arguments in romantic relationships can send signals to our brain that our relationship is in trouble. When this happens, our rational thinking suffers. We might hear blame and our defenses go up causing us to sometimes accuse our partners of wrong doing and not accept any responsibility ourselves. When you recognize this happening there are a few things you can do:

  • Take a break – you can try to remove yourself from the situation temporarily to regain some control of your emotions or allow your partner the space to do so

  • Remember your partner’s good qualities — this can help you turn your attention away from the negative thoughts running through your mind

  • Take some time to think about what triggered this response in you or your partner to increase your awareness for future conflict situations

Relationship expert John Gottman has been studying relationships and conflict for many years. You can read more about flooding on his website and checkout the Gottman Institute for more information on improving relationships.

Modern Change offers relationship counseling in Durham, NC.

Filed Under: healthy relationships

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5316 Highgate Dr. Suite 221
Durham, NC 27713

P: 919-576-0084
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